Hey S., thanks for the link, buddy. You’ve made my life. This is my new internet crack.
Via Omegle
Connecting to server…
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: hi
You: So far, everyone’s in Korea or China… what about you?
Stranger: canada babayyy!
You: niiiice
You: good, no more ESL
Stranger: you?
You: Amer’kuh
You: West Coast
Stranger: nice by the beach!
You: heh. not quite…
You: but not far either
You: so what brings you to chats with strangers?
You: brother’s facebook landed me here
Stranger: im a lonely person
Stranger: i dont really have anyone to tlk to
You: you do this often, then?
Stranger: hahahahahahah jk im vererrerery popular
!!!
!!!
Stranger: i have like 12 bfs
You: good you had me worried
You: I had already shed a solitary tear for your lonely life…
You: isn’t 12 bfs hard to handle though?
You: that must get complicated
Stranger: well i have a good memory
Stranger: are a boy
?
?
Stranger: cuz you could be lucky number 13
You: it’s more fun if you guess…
You: what do you think
You: am I a guy or a girl?
Stranger: hmmmmm
You: I can hear the Jeopardy music playing softly in the background
Stranger: you a boy
You: correct!
You: amazing
You: you must be psychic
You: sorry to let you down though, I don’t date Canadians
You: I can’t be your lucky 13
Stranger: woow why you quick to judge
Stranger: im such an awesome person
You: its complicated….sorry
You: to be honest, it’s a racial thing
You: I’m racist against canadians
You: no offense
You: most americans are racist
You: and I’m no exception
You: but at least I’m honest
Stranger: i thought you different
Stranger: 😥
You: so… let me guess… you’re a female student, between ages 19 and 25, right?
Stranger: effff no im 16
You: oooooooooohhh man
You: what are you doing up?
You: no matter what coast you’re on, you’re in trouble with your rents
Stranger: partying
You: partying… on the internet?
Stranger: yes indeed
You: sounds like a lame party, if you ask me.
Stranger: are you an old person ? how old are you ?
Stranger: cause idont want to be talking to a creep .
Stranger: and dont lie either
You: hah.
Stranger: cause thats gay shit man
You: I’m a 58 year old obese man from Wisconsin. I’m so lonely
You: please pretend you want to sleep with me just a little longer…?
Stranger: seriously
Stranger: i dont want to tlk with a creeeeeep
You: serious? serious as cancer. NOthing but pure, clean honesty in this chat room.
You: Creep? Do I sound like a creep?
You: Well… since we’re being honest…
You: I’m a creep. I’m a weirdo. What the hell am I doing here? I don’t belong here…
Stranger: F U im disconnecting bitch.
You: you don’t like radiohead?
Stranger: wtf
You: ITs a really popular song
You: about being a creep. DUH.
Stranger: okay..
You: wait… weren’t you disconnecting? You called me a bitch…
Stranger: cause you were being wierd.
You: You call me a creep. You call me a liar. You call me a bitch… honestly, my feelings are hurt
Stranger: honestly, you are.
You: I thought a 16 year old would know Radiohead, I’m sorry. I guess times have changed since my day.
Stranger: wow bye
You: TTFN!
Ed & The Red Reds 
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